Troubled kids behavior problems -parenting tips

Troubled kids are not born with problems. It is those parents, who must be responsible for their kid’s physical and mental development, fail to do their important job of parenting. Most parents in this modern world have lost the importance of shaping up their child's future due to the speed at which the modern world is growing up. Most parents rush up to their work without even showing attention to their kid’s achievements / problems. This is the saddest part of parenting.
Just ask your child, whether they like you. If they say "YES" and give you a hug / kiss [special ones] / smile happily at you, then you are in a right track of bringing up your child in a better way. Now let’s start with the causes for troubled kids.

Here are many causes for the misbehavior of kids, whose root cause is the Parent-child relationship problems. These troubled kids problems are caused due to parenting mistakes. The main parenting mistakes are as follows:

1. Parental Rejection
2. Over-protection
3. Providing more privileges
4. Excessive Pressure
5. Disciplinary Issues
6. Improper Role Models

Now let’s see them in detail.

1. Parental Rejection:
This is one of the major parenting mistakes done by most parents where both the couples would have been engaged with a job. This further result in serious problems when there is no grand-father/grand-mother to look after them at home. These Kids really long for the love of their parents. The reason for this includes
* Failure of parents to provide enough love and affection to their kid's.
* Failure of parents to show interest in their kid’s activities and achievements.
* Parents spending only less time with their kids.
This result in
* Aggressive character in kids.
* Pessimistic approach by the kids.
* Kids always trying to grab attention of their parents.
* Kids feeling loneliness at home even though their parents are present.

2. Over-protection:
This is caused by the overprotective nature of the parents. They try to provide a very secure environment to their kid, which prevents the kids from adapting to the surroundings. Over-protected Kids always look for the help from their parents and their mind-set changes to a state that they start to believe that their parents will take care of anything and there is nothing they should be worried of.
This result in
* Inability of the child to face the problems in the society.
* Kids enter into a state of fear, which is very dangerous.
* Kids have a submissive nature.

3. Providing more privileges:
This is caused by the provision of more privileges by the parents to their kids (i.e.) being more liberal towards their activities. This usually happens when the parents have only one child. This can be problematic in the long run, though initially it is good. The more privileged child will tend to see the society in the same way as how their parents treated them. This results in the society not being able to accept these type of kids, as these kids tend to be more self-oriented people without even caring for others.
This result in
* Selfish character in the child.
* These Kids tend to be less patient.
* These kids develop an aggressive attitude towards achieving what they want.

4. Excessive pressure:
This is caused when parents start demanding more from their kids, when they (kids) are not having such capabilities/talents or when they are slow in attaining those talents/capabilities. For e.g. A child is interested in chess and has a huge talent in it, whereas the parents of that child force him/her to practice tennis, which the child didn't like. This results in ruining the life of that child, who otherwise would have become a world chess champion.
This result in a conflict between the parent and the child and also a guilty feeling in the child.

5. Disciplinary Issues:
Disciplinary actions should not be less or more severe. It should be moderate and should be in a pleasant way and not in a harsh way.Less disciplinary actions results in aggressive and anti-social behavior. Severe disciplinary actions results in fear, kids hating their parents and an unfriendly character.So both these methods should be avoided.

6. Improper Parents:
Parents are the first role-model for any child. If parents have good qualities in them, then it results in kids following those qualities. But on the contrary, if the parents are addicted to alcohol/smoking/drugs/have some emotional problems, then it can affect the kids easily.Sometimes,They can provide a negative model appearance (i.e.) kids prefer to be not like them which is a good thing, but it is just a shame on the parents failing to be a role model to their kids.
This result in
* Mental disorders in kids.
* Make the kids vulnerable to alcohol/smoking/drugs.

Troubled kids have various behavioral problems such as arguing, biting, demanding, bragging, outburst, etc., which are irritating in parents point of view, but parents should be patient enough to teach their kids to stop these kind of behavior. You can use the tips provided here for the kind of behavior problem your kid has. If the problem still persists, consulting a psychologist is wise.

1. ARGUING:
Kids quarrel or argue repeatedly showing an unfriendly attitude towards their family or friend's. Kid's having this behavior always require their parents to solve problems for them. They implement the usage of violent behaviors such as kicking, etc; to get things done for them. They never listen to others advice or opinion, and are strongly adamant with their own views. They never admit their mistakes, rather they point to others as the cause or the reason behind their mistakes.
The Parenting tips include
* Teaching them how to end a conflict in a cool manner.
* Make them solve their problems themselves. Don't help them until there is an utmost situation.
* Teach them about others feelings. For e.g. how others feel when you quarrel with them?
* Teach kid's to compromise or apologize.

2. DOMINATING ATTITUDE:
This can also be called as bossy attitude. Kids having this kind of attitude tend to be commanding others of what to do or what to play. These kid's never converse in a polite manner. They never listen to others. They never apologize or compromise.
The Parenting tips include
* Teaching them how to compromise or negotiate in a polite manner.
* Teaching them the values of cooperation and don't fail to appreciate them whenever they exhibit these qualities.

3. BITING:
Kid's bite others for many reasons, which includes frustration, for getting attention, for protection, etc. Biting is the most dangerous of all aggressive behavior's.
The Parenting tips include
* First, parents should find out the reason for biting and then only they should act. Reason may be protection, frustration, stress, habitual, etc.
* Help your Kid's victim to make them understand how biting hurts others.

4. DEMANDING:
Certain kid's will be adamant in what they want. These type of kid's fall into this type of misbehavior.
The Parenting tips include
* Try to increase the values of empathy in them.
* Be strict in saying them that demanding will not be encouraged or tolerated.
* Tell your kid's what your limits are and advice them not to cross those limits.

5. BRAGGING:
This is a show-off quality in kids. It is a funny part until your kids are small, but when they start growing you will feel the heat. Kids tend to be too proud of their accomplishments even though they are small.
The Parenting tips include
* Find out the prime reason for bragging and act accordingly. The reasons may be low social status, praise-aholic attitude of parents, etc.
* Stop praising even small activities of your kid's such as brushing the teeth, etc.
* Teach your kid's to encourage or complement others talents or achievement's.
* Whenever your kid's start bragging, tell them about others abilities also, without degrading them.

6. USING BAD LANGUAGES/GESTURES:
This is an embarrassing quality in kids. Kids get addicted to them and the usage of bad words becomes a habit.
The Parenting tips include
* Parents must stop using bad word's, if they are doing so. Be an example to your kid's.
* Tell them about the adverse effects that usage of bad words can have on their family respect, which they enjoy in their society.
* Don't allow them to watch movies, TV-shows which are only suitable for adults.

7. OUTBURST:
This can also be referred to as tantrum’s. The reason's for kid's outburst includes frustration, to grab attention, etc. Outburst includes crying and screaming.
The Parenting tips include
* Stop asking your child to do activities, which are way beyond their abilities.
* Teach them how to express their frustration in a polite manner.
* Teach them relaxation techniques.
* Try to distract them during outburst.
* Don't respond to your child's tantrum and take them to place's where they can calm down.

8. BAD MANNER'S:
Bad manner's includes rudeness, disrespect, impoliteness, etc. Bad mannered kid's never respect others.
The Parenting tips include
* Teach them good manner’s.
* Teach them values of politeness.
* Try to be an example to them by being polite.
* Encourage your child to practice good manner's.
* Teach them how to treat or receive guests.

9. LYING:
Kid's lie often, leading to bad name among others. They don’t feel guilty for lying.
The Parenting tips include
* Set yourself as an example to them by being honest.
* Try to solve the problem's which are the prime reason for your kid's dishonesty.
* Tell them that you value their character more than anything else, and instill confidence in them for being honest at any situation.
* Be true to them, so that in turn they will be true to you.

10. FEAR:
Kid’s with fear do not take part in any competition. They feel difficult to face any kind of situation. They have fear of dark. They require elders always for safety.
The Parenting tips include
* Don’t allow them to watch violence/horror movies.
* Parents should be a role model to them in terms of courage.
* Allow your kid's to talk about their problems and try to rectify them.

11. NEGATIVE APPROACH:
This can also termed as pessimistic approach. Kid's tend to think about failures always. These kids have a pervasive attitude of " I CAN'T DO IT ". These kids are prone to daydreaming and unrealistic fantasies.
The parenting tips include
* First, Parents should be optimistic.
* Tell them inspirational stories of many great peoples to instill confidence in them.

12. INTROVERT:
Some Kid's tend to stay away from other kid's company. They don't feel comfortable, when they are in a group.
The parenting tips include
* Teach them how to reduce anxiousness.
* Try to make them play with small group of kid's first and then gradually increase the number of kid's they are playing with.
* Teach them how to face the groups.
* Motivate them to take part in various competitions, which can be helpful to them in reducing their shyness as well as to showcase their talents.
* Encourage them to take part in team games such as soccer, cricket, etc., to reduce their shyness.